how do i conclude what happen in 2010?

My way to conclude 2010

Relationship

This year, I meet a new person that able to make decide to open my heart again after i lost my love few years back. What can i explain about this person is he is a very confused man. Perhaps the way he look at me is just to play around or just to seek revenge for his lost and tragic love that he felt I one of the cause he lost it. But I know deep down his heart, he's a caring and loving man. Perhaps losing his love is a very big impact on him. Eventhough that doesnt give him the reason or right to break others heart. Guess i will never know what exactly in his mind. I cant hate him the way that i should cause eventhough what he did have no excuses but he somehow do give me a wonderful memory that i will cherish. I just hope he won't destroy the good things that i know about him. My love maybe nothing for him, but what i feel for him is sincere. He the second guy that able to make me feel again, he i see as a key to open my heart and mind towards relationship again. i may not able to have his love and affection, but when we love someone, that doesnt mean we will have him or wanted him. True is, i do love him before but i do not want him if he not able to love me the right way. Its true it is painful when u know the truth, such as everything is a lie. But, there is no point of having that love if there is no mutual connection. Loving him is something that i never expected, oh well, how can you expect to fall for your friend ex. Rules of friendship is, never ever fall for your friend ex. Last time i only heard of this rules, but now i know what its mean.

But now.. I somehow get over him and suprisingly, it's not that difficult.

Friendships

Last year on 2010... I make alots of new peoples that some of them become one of my close friends and some of them become the most unfavorable one. But, there are more good than the bad.Let's me start with the bad.

The bad is.. I get close with someone that i feel a bit similar with me. To the extend that people call us twin. Not because we look alike, but maybe our way are almost similar. I really love this friend alots.. i even to the extend fight with family because of her. because i give to much attention to her, care about her to much. Guess.. that where i go wrong. I let her use me to the extend I sacrifice my own feeling. I let her use me.. fuck.. that the most hated part of all. I can accept a guy to break my heart or play me. But not a betray from a friend that i care so much. Stupid me, I let her problem effect me. Her never ended guy problem and her stupidity effect me. why should i care for people like that? well.. at that time, i didnt know things can be so shitty. I didn't expect from 100%, 90%  from her are lies. How could i expect that.

But then i learn that we cannot expect people to do the same as we did. Maybe for her.. friendship is nothing and love to a guy is everything. Perhaps for her is different. Because if she love her friendship, why wont she appreciate me. Now i know exactly the reason why she don't really have friends. But then again, that her life, and her life is not my concern anymore. That's why i walk away. This friendship ain't worth it.

GOOD!!! well.. i make alots of new friends. From all that shitty that happen. I realize that there are many people that will support me and love me. I know that I'm not alone. 

hey 2010, hey new post, hey...

I just browse through some of my old post. Suprisingly, I haven't been blogging since feb this year. Guess that's why I say writing is not my passion eventhough I have so much things to say. Perhaps, I prefer say it out loud rather that craving it on the blog. But I guess, have to start writing back now. reason? because too many things happen this year. and wanted to share it with everyone that may read this blog, or following it.